Runaway.

You close your eyes and cried, dying for the right to feel...Nobody knows the trouble we've seen, nobody knows the price of this dream, nobody knows what it took to believe...Nobody. She wants to be free."

I feel like I'm stuck. I can't go forward, and I can't go back. I'm gripped with fear and anguish, sadness and sickness. I look behind me, I look in front of me. I can't believe the mess I've made. I want to collapse thinking about what it's going to take to undo all of it. Part of me wants to just give up, and part of me really wants to move forward. I go back and forth with my thoughts and emotions all day long. People look at me and see a smiling face, and they have no idea what's going on inside. They will never know. That's part of the beauty of this struggle...you have something that is genuinely yours. It's personal, it's your best friend in certain ways. But that's also what makes us so lonely.

I want to be okay. I want to be happy. I want to love myself. I want this burden off my back. Too bad it's easier said than done. I don't even know where to start.

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