We leave for my parents' house Thursday morning, and while I was never thrilled about it, I've officially lost any optimism I may have had about it. My mom and I talked today, and she made me feel guilty for leaving home when I did, and because of J's work schedule we'll only be able to visit them for 3 days. I love my mom, I love my entire family, but sometimes I wish they would just mind their own business. I have to live my life. I can listen to their advice, but in the end, the choice is mine to make. I know they mean well, and they think they're helping me, but all they've done is make me feel overwhelmed and upset. I feel so pressured from every side. I feel like I've been thrust into the world, unprepared, with a million different voices shouting at me to do a million different things. Seems like somehow, I'm supposed to be able to navigate the murky waters of decision and consequence correctly, and yet, they all tell me that all I have for a paddle is apathy. How ironic.
I'm sure most of you know exactly what I'm talking about. It all seems to be commonplace among "our kind". I hope all of you have a little more direction and a little more luck than I.
Then again, it could be a lot worse.
Thinspo update later.
xoxo
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